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Feb 7

What a guy really wants for Valentine’s

Posted on Monday, February 7, 2011 in Kat, love, Men, Relationships, Singles, Women

Sara was leading us purposefully through the mall toward Anthropologie, hopeful she hadn’t waited too long to return a Christmas gift that she finally decided was all wrong for her.

On the way, we literally had to bushwhack the mall’s pink and red landscape.

“Oh yeah” Sara said, noticing the hearts, cupids and roses, “what are you getting
Sean for
Valentine’s?”   

“Nothing,” I shrugged. “Maybe a card.”

“Kat, you’re so unromantic!”

“I’m totally romantic! Valentine’s has
nothing with do with romance.”

“I know, but you really have to do something!”

Do you? Because giving a gift because you have to give a gift is, what – a good thing?

I’m not a fan of Valentine’s Day, a silly Hallmark holiday that almost always makes people feel bad. It’s a no-win holiday. Expectations — OK, make that women’s expectations — are so high that no matter what’s given or done, it often seems “wrong,” even if a guy relies on the old standbys — chocolates, lingerie, roses, a store-bought card and reservations at a restaurant with a menu designed for “romance.”

Poor guys.

It’s no better for the unattached who have yet another holiday to “cope” with, according to the mags and dating “experts.” Maybe singles wouldn’t feel so “bad” about being alone on Valentine’s if people stopped acting as if they should feel bad about it!

But, OK — let’s say you think like Sara does and you want to get your sweetie something. But … what? Honestly, I don’t envy guys because a “wrong” Valentine’s Day gift can evidently screw up a pretty good relationship. That’s why so many guys resort to jewelry, flowers and fancy dinners; they’re safe. Still, what do you give a guy on Valentine’s Day? Guys are kind of hard to buy things for in general; otherwise there’s no way to explain why so many of them end up with so many socks and ties. Socks are a gift, people?!?

Yet it has to be better than getting a stuffed teddy bear holding a red heart embroidered with “I love you.” Is there a man alive who wants that? Is there a woman? (um, OK, well, there probably are a few …)

Gadgets, tools, sports apparel, car gear, gag gifts, Scotch — these are the kind of things we tend to give the guys in our life. And, maybe that’s what many guys like.

Ultimately, that’s really what it’s all about — giving the guy you care about something that you know he’ll like, because you’re paying attention to what he likes. Which means this Valentine’s I’ll probably make Sean a very nice dinner and show up naked at the door with a martini in my hand.

Hey, I’ve been paying attention!

  • Do you stress over Valentine’s Day gifts?
  • What’s the best Valentine’s Day gift you’ve ever given?
  • What’s the best Valentine’s Day gift you’ve ever gotten?
  • Guys, what things do you really want?

photo © dimis – Fotolia.com