Sara and I were savoring our lattes, taking a break from post-holiday returns and bargains, when we ran into a guy we knew from the gym. He was with a woman, a fat woman.
“Wonder who that is,” Sara said, gesturing in her direction.
“Maybe it’s his girlfriend. Wait, he once told us he’s married, right?”
Sure enough, it was his wife.
“She’s packing a little more than the holiday 5 pounds, isn’t she?” Sara snarked.
“They’re married; people gain weight when they’re in a relationship. And, who knows — maybe he’s into BBWs.”
“But he’s so fit!”
Yes, he is. And that always makes me wonder what’s going in a relationship when there clearly is a difference of opinion about such an essential thing as caring for your body.
Men often feel pimped when their women gain a lot of weight. That’s when they often lose an interest in sex, too. Nothing gets you out of the
mood for sex than hating your body.
Of course, maybe many women gain weight so they can get out of having sex in the first place.
I’m sure that doesn’t fly well with their hubbies, either!
Sure, I weighed more when I was married
— so did almost all my girlfriends, about 8 to 10 pounds more each. Not really fat, just “juicy.” I
think when you have young kids and you’re so exhausted at night that pounding a bag of chips and salsa on the couch in front of reruns sounds like fun, it’s easy to gain weight.
No way that I’d live like that anymore. And, I’m
not interested in being with a fat man, either, and no, that doesn’t make me shallow. But if my sweetie started to get heavy, I would say something — because I love him, and that’s what loving couples do. They talk honestly and lovingly about things that matter, and they hear that with love, too.
Now that we’re closing in on New Year’s and resolutions, many will vow to get in shape
this year — and many won’t.
Still, I wonder — why do so many women
pack on the pounds after they fall in love?
Is it a way to avoid intimacy?
Or is it just love and accept me the way I am?
Photo © Dan Race – Fotolia.com