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Get naked, just don’t get paid for it

Posted on Thursday, August 12, 2010 in Honesty, Kat, Men, Relationships, Sex/sexuality, Women

“This totally pisses me off,” Sara said, throwing down the newspaper in disgust.

“What are you talking about?”

“Just because Jodie Fisher posed nude and did a little soft porn like 10 years ago, she’s seen as some bimbo gold-digging slut who brought
down a hot-shot CEO — as if he had
nothing to do with it.”     

“Well, he …”

“He’s married, for crap’s sake!”

“Yes, but …”

“Look, maybe she is a gold-digger. Maybe the whole sexual harassment claim is bogus. But
what does her past have to do with it? Is making porn or posing nude a crime?”

No, it’s not, at least not in the United States. As
a matter of fact, your neighbors are probably posting last night’s amateur sex tapings on the Internet right now. And your teenage daughter? She just sextexted some hottie she hopes to sit next to in AP English when school starts later this month. Or, maybe it was to the really cute teacher.

Is Fisher any better or worse than a certain recent president who tossed off his druggie past as “youthful indiscretion”? Probably not.

The difference is this — she’s attractive, she’s a woman and it has something to do with sex. That’s a deadly threesome.

I know quite a few women who have been
sexually harassed, including me. Would I have sued one of my harassers? Hey, I’d love to see justice, because some of them made things really crappy for me at work. But there was that time I had sex with a man I barely knew in a public place; and the time I wore that uber-slutty outfit when I was in college (the only age you can absolutely get away with such antics) and hoping to sleep with the lead guitarist of a band I liked; and at least one of my former boyfriends has Polaroids of me being a nasty little girl.

How likely would it be that those things would work against me?

I don’t know, but you can ask Jodie Fisher.

OK, so my “youthful indiscretions” probably never made it past someone’s now-failing memory or crumpled in a nightstand drawer. I wasn’t in a Playboy collegiate spread or a movie like “Intimate Obsession.

Not to say that I wouldn’t if had someone asked. But, whatever …

No, I didn’t profit from my sexuality, but I’m guessing that wouldn’t get me off the hook. Ms. Fisher, who had dreams of stardom, worked her looks and bod — which all gals do to a certain extent. And it’s happening younger and younger, thanks to a hottie-obsessed society. hey, people — sex sells! But, she got paid for it, too. Maybe we just don’t like that.

We all like watching porn (well, many of us), we have pole-dancing girls nights out, we sextext naked pictures of ourselves to our sweetie yet we judge those make their living from the same things. That’s weird.

HP’s Mark Hurd leaves with $28 million. Fisher’s working at her mom’s staffing agency, in between a dry cleaner and a hair salon, in a small strip mall in New Jersey, raising her son.

But I’ll bet somewhere someone’s offering her lots of money to pose nude again. Because, we’ll want to see it!

If I had a daughter, I’d be so making sure she wasn’t posting anything sexy on Facebook or sending naked pics of herself over her cellphone. But, I have a son; I guess I have nothing to worry about.

  • Why do we diss women who make a living off of their looks and bod (while hoping to them naked at the same time?
  • Does someone’s sexual past matter in a sexual harassment suit?

Bring on the comments

  1. Steve says:

    I can see a little bit of everyone’s point in this issue.

    Sexual harassment suits don’t seem as prevalent now, but back in the day they seemed to be similar McCarthyism. The mere accusation being made was enough for someone to lose their job. Forget that pesky issue of proof.

    I can understand (not endorse) a lawyer doing everything s/he can for her/his client, forgetting what might be fair or not.

    I can see the lawyers temptation to make the argument

    “This person has been willing to do things before, that most people would not, to monetize their sexuality. Who is to say that this is just not another iteration of that? Especially given the lack of evidence for the claim?”


    Almost everything in our culture if f**d up as far as our sexuality goes. In a rational world, nothing consenting adults do for sexual pleasure should ever be an issue, even if it involves money.

    I know it isn’t likely and many of my own attitudes have a foot in our culture’s backward mentality.

  2. Momma Sunshine
    Twitter: momma_sunshine

    Of course her sexual past doesn’t matter. That’s kinda like saying that a prostitute can’t be raped.

    We can’t forget about the fact that we all have the ability to make choices in our life. Choosing to pose nude is one thing; having someone think they can treat us as a sexual object for their own selfish gratification is quite another.

  3. Kat Wilder says:

    You can sextext naked pictures of yourself, but if you get paid to pose naked, everyone will judge you. Fair?

  4. dadshouse
    Twitter: dadshouseblog

    It takes two to tango. HP found no harrassment. Fisher said they didn’t have a sexual relationship. The thing that’s hard for me to take is that Fisher went after publicity when Hurd got fired. By doing so, she guarantees she will never get a corporate job again. Who on earth would hire her? No, she did it to help her acting career.

    If there really was sexual harrassment, she could have quietly dealt with it behind closed doors, settled the matter, and gotten on with her life. That she grabbed the media spotlight afterwards makes her a skank in my book.

  5. BigLittleWolf
    Twitter: BigLittleWolf

    Interesting post. Many ways to look at these situations, and we never have the full story.

    One’s past? Irrelevant – or should be. As for publicity? Maybe there was an assumption that there would never be a regular job again no matter what, so go for broke.

    As a society, we’re more than a bit immature when it comes to matters of sexuality – public or private.

  6. Tiia Jones says:

    Get naked, just don’t get paid for it via @AddThis

  7. bodecibody says:

    I agree with Dad above. I am just a bit sick of people in persuit of fame and fortune via the “tell all media gossip machine”. I am so glad I do not get the papaer anymore. I’d never had heard about the whole sorted mess if it weren’t for your post.

    I guess I am now glad for the story as you wrote a great blog about it!

  8. Kat Wilder says:

    Steve — Almost everything in our culture if f**d up as far as our sexuality goes. And ain’t that the truth!?!

    Momma Sunshine — Amen!

    Dads — I agree that there was no reason for her to go public except to gain something out of it; that’s not the point though. The point is, what does her past have to do with anything related to this case? And the answer is, “Nada!”

    BLW — Yeah, we are immature about sexuality. We’re surrounded by sex, either by choice or by force (the media, etc.) or some combo thereof and then act horrified when someone (usually a woman) chooses to act on it.

    bodecibody — I’m sick of it, too, but we have ourselves to blame for it. I mean, aren’t we all narcissistic in this Facebook, MySpace blogging world? Again, the point isn’t her quest for fame — it’s, does her sexual past have anything to do with anything. No, it doesn’t. End of story!

  9. Mike Ramsey says:

    Thanks for the sexy post!

    What I would say sex should also be its boundary it can’t be happened with everyone, everywhere or any age…to keep the society respectful.