Mia called me but I could barely make out what she was saying; she was so excited she was practically tripping over her words.
“Mia, slow down and tell me what happened.”
“I got a promotion!”
“That’s so awesome! Of course, it was looong overdue. Let’s go celebrate!”
And we did.
Fast forward a year, and Mia hates her job. She’d finally gotten where so wanted to be, only to discover that it really wasn’t what she wanted at all. And, now she feels stuck — and unhappy.
Well, that makes everything simple …
But, I know what he’s saying. We wish on pennies (oh, OK, I do) and work hard for something — the CEO spot, the hottie, the perfect house — and then when we get it, we think, is that it? We spend money, time and energy trying to find Mr. Right, plan the most amazing wedding and honeymoon, and then x-number of years of living with the man we
said we’d love til death do we part is a walking list of irreconcilable differences. Then we get divorced, and immediately start looking for someone new to re-create some version of
what we just got out of.
Why are we often unhappy when we get what we want?
OK, maybe we’re wanting the wrong things. But, most of the time, it’s because of something in us. How many celebs, people “who have it all,” live totally dysfunctional lives or OD on drugs, intentionally or not? How many people multimillion lottery winners end up destitute or messed up?
As someone who hasn’t had the chance for that kind of fame and fortune, I say — hey, try me! I’m pretty sure I could do better.
Although, once we’re a success, we often feel we don’t deserve it. And a lot of times, we trip ourselves up along the way, fearful that we’ll actually get it, and then what?
It’s the same with relationships; we often self-sabotage by carrying baggage overflowing with fear and bad behaviors into a new relationship. Well, if it didn’t create a healthy relationship in the past, why do we think it will in the future?
There’s one constant in all our problems in life — we’re there when they happen.
If you think of success as power — and many people take that to an extreme level — then what Uncle Ben tells Peter Parker, aka Spider-Man, is true: “With great power comes great responsibility.”
The hard work doesn’t end once we get something; actually, that’s when it all begins.
- What have you worked hard to get and ended up unhappy with?
- Has something you didn’t want turn out to be something great?
- If you “had it all,” would you be happy?
- Do you self-sabotage relationships?
Photo © Svetlana Tikhonova – Fotolia.com