“So, do you come here often?”
What a cliche opener, even if it was back in the ’70s — the absolute height of that sort of talk. But what was even odder is that it came from the cute bartender; wouldn’t he know? Actually it was my first time at his bar, but based on his looks
alone, I was definitely planning to make it my
regular stomping ground.
I was flattered, and even though he was getting lots of attention from all the other young hotties — he was that cute — he was flashing that dimply smile and flirting with me.
By the end of the night, he had my phone number. We went out a few times, and I found myself stopping in his bar more than usual. And each time
I was there, he had a throng of hotties ogling him, chatting him up, giggling about him to each other as girls tend to do. Since I was young and inexperienced, I did what probably any other gal would do — I got jealous!
“What did you expect?” my friend Janie said to me. “He’s a bartender!”
I started to explain myself but, really, what did I expect? I was dating an attractive guy who worked at a bar — the No. 1 magnet for cute gals. It only taks a few beers to turn any nice
girl into a ho.
There are some professions that seem custom-made for flirting and, one might guess, cheating. And its ugly relative, jealousy. Think: bartending, acting, modeling, musicians — most attract people with big egos, good looks and freewheeling lifestyles. So I was a little surprised that the most adulterous professions according to AshleyMadison.com — the Web site that smooths the way for infidelity — (courtesy of Penelope Trunk) for men are doctors, police officers, lawyers, real estate agents and engineers; for women it’s teachers, stay-at-home moms (WTF?) nurse, administrative assistants and then real estate agents.
Who knew real estate agents were so randy?
Why? Because those jobs require long hours and are stressful; and I imagine there’s some business travel sex, too.
If you fall in love with a guy whose profession is prone to attracting hotties offering up the goods, do you have a right to be jealous? Wouldn’t that be a known occupational hazard?
Same thing if you fall in love with a hottie in general; I mean, other people are going to find him or just as gorgeous as you do. Are they going to stop lusting after them just because they’re with you? Uh, not!
So, what are you going to do about your jealousy?
I was thinking about that after reading what my blogging friend T wrote in a discussion with Momma Sunshine on Canadian Bald Guy‘s blog; the post was about whether men and women can be friends, and that’s when the big J — jealousy — came up. T’s main squeeze isn’t happy with her hanging out with men who lust after her.
It’s hard to control other people’s lust, isn’t it?
Jealousy does more harm than good in a relationship, and what it really comes down to is trust — even if some say jealousy is inextricable from passion (and I am all about the passion!)
Sean and I talk openly about our attractions to others, and tease each other about it. It’s part of our story, the way our humor plays off each other. But, I trust him, and he trusts me. If one of us broke that trust, well …
- Is jealousy a good thing or bad thing in love?
- How jealous are you?
- Are you more jealous if you’re with someone who’s handsome/gorgeous?
Photo by © Fred Sweet – Fotolia.com